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10 Nov 2011

Kicking

The night time ritual has not changed. (No... we are not Satanists) I mean the same routine in getting my 'sleep-a-phobic' to bed has not been altered.
You see... even though the routine is the same as in Dinner, a little TV, Story Time and brushing of teeth, the hour being the same and as well as the bed being the same there seems to be a slight discrepancy. There are also the same excuses as mentioned in an older post but now with a little more in-depth questioning.
Yet... It has changed.
There was once a time when there was a cot, a cot that the 'one', so we thought, could not escape from and was happily Sleeping In.  Well it was just a cot really. Anyway, that cot had had its day when my little acrobat took a nasty fall. The very next day we bought a bed and that bed has been doing its job quite well, until now!

It's the wee hours after midnight when I am awaken by a 'thud', that wouldn't be a problem if this whack was somewhere other than to the back of my head or back. Thank goodness I have not as yet been kicked somewhere where men will cry about for days.
What has happened? Why is the bed not doing its purpose? Is it the stories she listens to at story-time or some shows she watches on television? As now my football striker is afraid to be alone in a dark room and has been for the last couple of months using me as a practice soccer ball in my bed. Even if we put her down later than usual I still find a new bruise the following day or a leg that is stopping the flow of oxygen entering my mouth.
I seriously wouldn't mind so much if those legs attached to the little bed hog were kept on the other side of the bed and the headaches I have in the morning were self induced after a good night of partying.

What do we do to keep my future 'Beckham' to stay in her own room? Or, if she is in my bed, stop her legs from occupying the whole space and kicking a squashed, comatose man?
I think foot-binding may be a little extreme but I am seriously considering it.
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